WOO

Yesterday was the doctor's appointment. Took many many vials of blood, and got all of the moving parts checked out. Been diagnosed for now with depression, as well as a couple other things. I don't know much at the moment, but I do know that my doctor is available, attentive, and really sweet. I'm loving her, and the other people who work at the clinic are just fantabulous.

I'm on Lexapro right now for the depression/anxiety. It's nice to know that there's something there. Soon enough I'll know a lot more.

For now, that's the health update.

I GOT MY CORSETS!

They're all really cute and I'll probably post pictures in a while. I've been trying to wear them every day, and so far I've worn them out a couple times too. Nothing like the looks you get from the older women at the grocery store when you show up in a corset and short lace skirt. LOL Any ways. I plan to make this blog more informative, but for right now I need to focus on me, so that's what it will be :P

What's going on?

I've started dealing with things that haven't been an issue before.

I'm seeing things that aren't there, watching movements that don't exist, my joints suddenly weight hundreds of pounds, my muscles twitch relentlessly, I have trouble sleeping or I sleep so hard that the days seem unreal. These sensations, on top of the pain, and the strange sleep schedule are so exhausting. Between this whole ordeal and the mood swings from hell I feel like I'm going crazy in a sane world. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to be normal and sane, I'm trying to keep going like a human being, but I just can't. I feel guilty. I feel wrong. I feel like a painting that's been all mushed up. I feel like so many things that I can't pinpoint a feeling. I feel too much, I want to do too much, everything feels to bright, too quiet, too confusing, too abrasive... Sensations, feelings, and pain are too much. I'm on sensory overload and it's making me crazy and irritable. How do I cope with this? Anyone?